Monday, August 14, 2006

Sick Again!

I am so tired of falling sick all the time!! I'm home and coughing my guts out and sneezing and blowing out every piece of my brain!

I've never fallen sick so often in my life and now I can't even count the amount of time that I am sick because it's happening a bit too often!

And I'm also tired of braving it and go to work when I'm not 100%... or even 50%! Why? It's not because I'm not dedicated... it's because I do think that work is the problem!

Before being in that office, OK... I've do get ill... but I've never gotten ill like every month!

A month ago, the Health and Safety Officer came into my office... and the first thing he asked was... Have you been ill lately?

What am I suppose to think? H&S guy came in, had a quick glance... and that's what he asked.

I'm tired of being sick, I'm tired of my body rebelling against me, I'm tired of working in that office! But apparently, nothing could be done about that office... to reduce my illness and stress level...

I guess there's only one way for me to respond... I have to leave. Once I'm well enough to sit for more than 10minutes in front of the PC, it is time for me to update my CV and put myself in the market again before I get more sick than I have now.

I'm just angry that it's affecting my personal life too. Weekend was spoilt because I was sick. It was Danni's birthday and I forced myself to go out because I don't see Danni that often and it's a special occasion... but I ended just sitting there trying to cope with the loud music and can't talk that much because my throat was hurting. I felt like I spoilt her birthday.

I didn't manage to do any cleaning or cooking or shopping or even write my blog... because I felt awful! This is the first time that I actually sat in front of the computer since Saturday morning after my 20 minutes chat with my sister... which is unusual because I'm always in front of my computer if I'm not doing anything else.

Weekend is my time and I didn't manage to do anything.

Jules was very patient and just let me rest... but I was angry with myself for being ill... though I had no say in it...

But that is wrong... I do have a choice... and my choice is to leave... It's time for me to really sit down and actually do something about it. I love most of the people that I work with... but it's not a reason to stay.


Anonymous Nina said...

The mind is the most powerful organ and once it starts to send negative signal to the body; it is not a good sign.

I guess, it is nature's way to let you know that something isn't right. It is time for contemplation and reflection, change of direction etc...

Get well soon my dear.

8/14/2006 03:59:00 pm  
Blogger yati said...

another wise advise from you! i think my mind and body is shouting loud and clear. i've been delaying this... but i guess the time has come.

now time for another cup of lemsip!


8/14/2006 07:36:00 pm  
Anonymous Seb said...

I once watched a movie (French) which was a bit surreal.

It was about some kids coming back in time to our time (they are from the future) and telling this guy about what they do everyday.
Roughly, in that future, they got rid of consumerism and live mostly in harmony with nature (bloody hippy).

Once a week, they have an 'intelligence course'.
- What's an intelligence course ask the man?
- We go walking for 2 hours in the mountain. Replied one of the kid.
- Walking in the mountains makes you more intelligent?
- Yes, you should try it.

Go for a 2 hours walk in the park to clear your head. No book, no music. It will all fall into place.

P.S. you never mentionned my gay dancing at the party on Saturday!

8/14/2006 10:34:00 pm  
Blogger yati said...

seb.. i could see that you're not taking that movie seriously enough :-p what is the title anyway?

now could you see how ill i was??!! i must be that ill to miss out a paragraph on your gay dancing!

8/15/2006 09:27:00 am  
Blogger Cheeky said...

hey silly dont go thinking you spoilt my birthday it was just really nice to see you (even if you were snotty LOL) thank you for pulling ya self up to come and say hello hun it meant alot :D


8/16/2006 04:35:00 pm  
Blogger yati said...

aaaaaaaaawwwwwwwww cheeky... thanks for that! it was nice to see you too even if i was mute for the whole evening!

hugs back!!

8/17/2006 06:43:00 am  

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